Tuesday, October 13, 2009

1984 Transformers Board Game: Defeat the Decepticons

I bought this board game thinking it would be so fun to play as a family. Unfortunately, I was dead wrong. The artwork, for the most part, is your standard stock photos with a few new ones thrown in to spice it up. This aspect I do appreciate seeing how I am a huge G1 Transformers fan, but the rules/gameplay is so confusing it cheapens the experience. It's like being infatuated with Christina Ricci, then meeting her in person and finding out she is no better than a $20 hooker. Looks can be deceiving.

The setup is nice, and especially as an adult, gave me that nostalgic feel I was hoping far. There are four sets of "PAWNS" which are just pictures of Optimus Prime in robot and alt mode on different color cardboard. 30 "TOKENS" in all of 6 minicars in various colors, which even though they were just pictures on round multicolored circular pieces of the same cardboard, actually worked out quite well. A beautiful game board, dice, and my favorite part, the "GAME CARDS" which featured some of my favorite G1 characters that had actions you would have to use through out the game.

Although it looks nice and simple, the rules are far from it. It says ages 7-Adult, but i could not see any kid wanting to play this game now a days....or any adult for that matter. Except maybe me and that's just because I am a loser and have no life. When you get into the game itself, it feels like a clusterfucked version of Chinese Checkers meets Sorry. It is 2-4 players, but I would recommend playing the game with four. When you play the game with just two people, it drags on and instantly becomes a chore to finish. Like being forced to go clothes shopping with your wife/girlfriend, you keep asking yourself "when will this be over?" even though you know the answer. When you are dead of course. Chances are she will out live you and use your savings account when you are dead to buy a nice new dress, so she looks pretty while she dances on your grave.

I bought this game off of evil-Bay for $10 including shipping. Not a lot of money, but after playing the game I realized that would have been better spent on cheap wine and a tasty burger....at least I would have had more fun that way. If you feel you need this for your collection I wouldn't pay a dime more for it. It's really not worth it unless you want the game for the artwork or , for you stoners, plan to use the board itself as a rolling tray.

Click to read the instructions. 1 2 3